Simple Coleslaw

Simple Coleslaw (serves 11, or however many people you want, really)
I'm calling it simple because actually, coleslaw is ridonkulously simple to begin with. A couple of years ago I overheard an American couple in my local supermarket speaking in English and despairing that they couldn't find something... I offered to help in case I knew the Finnish name for the mystery product, but alas, they wanted coleslaw, and it didn't exist in Finland at the time. They were gobsmacked when I suggested making it themselves out of just cabbage, carrots and mayo. Yes kids, that's all there is to it.

Ingredients:
* Raw cabbage, chopped up. I use a quarter of a cabbage and it does about eight serves as an accompaniment. Look at the chunk you have in your hands and keep in mind it will make 2-3 times as much coleslaw once it's chopped up. That's how you decide how much cabbage to use.
* Medium Carrots, grated. I use about 3 of them for each quarter of cabbage.
* Cold water. Hopefully you have some of this at home.
* Mayonnaise. A bit. I don't really know how much because yesterday I just used what was left in the jar - a very scientific amount. Start with about 60g (two ounces) I suppose, put it in a jar with the same amount of water and shake the crap out of it until they're combined. This is your dressing - add it to the bowl, toss the salad, taste the salad (for research purposes), see if you need to add more.

Photo thanks to the bigcbbq.com people, who took a better snap than me.

End result == coleslaw! This version is super easy, and tastes a thousand times more fresh than the boring stuff that comes with a fast food meal. Plus it's crunchier. It will keep in the fridge for few days. Note: it will not keep in the fridge if your kids discover it and appropriate it as a snack. You may need to label it "Hands Off!" etc.

Optional extras for variety:
1-2 finely chopped shallots / spring onions, or half an onion
chopped apple
corn kernels
chopped walnuts, toasted almonds or pecans