Kitchen Shenanigans

So I vaguely had in mind to cook properly from scratch once a week and also bake something once a week. But this is me. 😂 I will say it was immensely satisfying to rejig my kitchen and it now feels like a room I like using again. ✅ 

The first Monday I bought Carrot Cake fixings and then realised I'd forgotten cream cheese for the icing. 😑 I made Courgette Muffins instead. They worked, but were too heavy on the veg so were overly moist rather than chocolatey. We both did eat some, but they didn't keep well and a few ended up binned.

For dinner I tried hamburger patties on the frypan (I haven't used the stove top for years!) and they were a big hit with Little X. ✅

I also made a dessert, white choc marshmallow with cereal pressed in. This was amazing. It's Rice Crispy Bars from the supermarket except more, and however you prefer it. I just made it up as I went along. Little X ate some but absolutely hated the sunflower seeds and that caused some drama. 🎭

The second week I cooked Tuna Mornay. This ended up with "mmmmmm" at high volume 😂 so I think we found another food she'll eat. We also had meatballs in savoury rice - not from scratch really but another food she will eat. ✅  For baking I made banana bread tonight. Ladies and gentlemen it's the fluffiest cake I think I've ever eaten. It's definitely delicious but the jury is out as to whether a cake this soft will stay edible after 2 days.

If it lasts that long.

She also enjoyed fresh pikelets this week. 😋 

I now have 5 defaults and 2 more say they will default me. As they do so, I am beginning a £2/month payment to each one. To my great surprise one debt recovery company wrote to me accepting £2 a month as an ongoing arrangement 😲 despite me not asking if that was OK 😲 and it isn't even the smallest debt. I am now hoping others do the same - they manage 3 other debts of mine so we shall see. 🤞

Microwave is an absolute disaster and I'm using it as little as possible. Air fryers are on sale this week for £25 🤔 and I am also pondering a £6 saucepan since I don't own one. And a £7 frypan as both mine are awful. 🤔 

A Pressie, Of Sorts

I got a letter from Personal Loan Bank which was a strange surprise. They say they won't be taking legal action and that the Notice of Default they sent last week, warning of possible legal action, was only sent to me because they had to, by law. No other bank has sent such a "no need to panic" - type letter like this. 🤔  It's the only bank I owe five figures to, so this was nice to read.

I haven't caught up with my money podcasts for months (or the weekly money-saving emails) and I kept thinking I must get around to them all. But truth be told, I haven't found anything in them that I need in a long time. I've been poverty-level hesitant to spend for years, but now it's more that I just don't want any more stuff coming into my home. Not a bad thing! 😂 

Another set of shelves given away today too. 👍

Spent half an hour with a British Gas idiot. No thanks I don't need to change my home circumstances on your register, please just reissue my bill because with the updated meter read I supplied a week ago, and my missed smart meter installation credit of £40, I should be in credit. That painful explanation convo took 15 minutes of text. .. I'm now £20 in credit so at least they'll stop sending bill renunders. But he still forgot the £40 that I specifically asked him to do. Then when I asked how long those £40 credits normally take to show up, he asked if it was an appointment for installing a boiler. No mate, a smart meter, like I told you. I don't usually give a poor rating for CSAs but I'm afraid that asking for my bank statement (yes, he asked for my bank statement, wtf) helped Dhruv score a 3/10.

Quietly confident that Little X's digestion is recovered. Another few rounds of toast, dry cereal and crackers, just to make sure. 

Refreshing

Today was another "getting stuff done" exercise. I didn't clear the whole lot that I had wanted, but I did get a couple of hours' housework done as well and the extra floor space is refreshing in a way I hadn't expected.

I donated quite a bit of stuff. It was sobering to find so many things that were either unused, duplicates or used only once. It's not only that I've clearly shopped without purpose, it's the fact I'd had so much clutter that I didn't know what I already had (and bought it again).

I can see it in Little X too this afternoon. I packed away her big set of blocks, and pulled out some toys she hasn't seen in a while. She's calm, content and enjoying herself. Having a tidy room to play, without being bombarded by "stuff", is obviously a big plus. It's refreshing to the mind.

More than anything it's meant I can clearly see what still needs doing, and now I have the space to do it, without it seeming like a monumental task. 😊

Two banks have now visibly defaulted me 👏 and I have started sending token payments. Nine more to go. 

Glacial Pace

The paradox of not being a child is that life goes both way too fast and also way too slow. It's almost 72h since I finished my most recent work shift, I didn't do anything strenuous, and I'm still aching. Little X had an awfully unsettled day at home following the usual long day at nursery without sleep the day before. Me being at work two days a week effectively ruins five days a week for us. So I've written my resignation letter.

Nursery has told me that she has 15 funded hours per week until the end of the school year, so I'm just going to leave her in and have her attend shorter days. Once I finish with work I should have three more weeks of nursery and I'm using those days to do a deep clean and ready the flat for sale.

Currently close to half way through the "stuff exodus" and I hope to have it mostly complete before work ends. Loads has left which was brand new and worth a fair bit of money, but guess what, I haven't missed any single item, at all. It's just as valuable to me on the sales shelves of a charity shop as it was at my place buried in a box.

Vague victory: after missing their call twice due to them hanging up after one ring, I enjoyed countless transfers and cutoffs today on the phone for 2 hours with the DWP. End result I finally managed to pay my £634 National Insurance top up. 👏 The budgeting advance did turn up 👏 and the UC people have just been in complete silence in response to my "WTF are you doing?". But I have it... and I've spent it, catching up with my maintenance arrears on the flat. So I've updated my list. It's nice to see it shrinking. 💪 

Invoices and Paradigm Shifts

I have received my first childcare invoice and am in the process of having it reimbursed by Universal Credit. And apparently, I also have the option of a budgeting advance of £800. The world doesn't end if they say no, but it would feel good to have my maintenance arrears taken care of. It would help motivate me to get the flat ready for sale.

Along those lines I did a big shop at German Supermarket on UC day and while I was there I spotted paint for £13. In white. So I bought two. It was like cementing a major decision, yes, I'm now mentally committed to a very minor flat makeover. It's like putting lipstick on a pig, but first impressions matter, and it might mean £1,000 more on the sale price. 🙏

The grocery component came to £42, which is on the high side. It was intentional though... In my new mindset of not clinging to every object, I'm also relaxing the vice grip on penny-pinching. There's so many things I've denied myself and Little X which are beyond fair. This week she's had fruits and nuts she's never tried before. Party rings. Flavoured crisps. Orange squash. I know a toddler doesn't need all this every day, but it's well overdue for her to have a touch of normality. I don't want her to grow up terrified of spending every penny. I will still choose budget options, but no more basic denial of entire food groups.

Bought: £100 voucher for above-mentioned German Supermarket, then Everup had a 6.25% offer for Fave Mainstream Supermarket so I spent another £100 on that. Between them I got loads of points and played them through the games, ended up with £13 in the account for my next voucher. These vouchers also help steer me away from Nearby Less Cheap Supermarket. 👍

Actionism

I'm sure that's not a word, but it was my attempt not to accidentally re-use a previous heading. Anyway, twice this week after taking Little X to nursery and hacking up a lung, I Got Stuff Done™, two major pieces of furniture are emptied and ready for sale, several items are ready to give away, a huge bag of stuff went into the bin and I gathered 9 bags for charity. I donated them this afternoon and it felt really good to be free of them. I even managed two loads of washing. 😇

The milestone is that a quarter of my excess stuff is now gone. I am aiming for 100 bags and that's 25 done. 💪

Debt Charity asked why I hadn't paid my May instalment and I snapped back with the cancellation agreement they sent me in March. I then got an enquiry of was I having problems affording the May payment or had something happened to affect my budget? I had to shout (in text) to make them try reading what I sent them, and that they clearly hadn't cancelled things like they promised. So that was entertaining. The first bank has actually notified me they've defaulted 🎉 although I can't see it anywhere on my credit files yet. It's still a waiting game. 

Feeling: energised. 

I Could Have

... pushed through and gone to work today. We're both snotty, but on the mend. I know that if we'd gone in, she'd be stumbling around exhausted at nursery, unable to get herself to relax. It was the right decision even though I feel lazy.

I'm second-guessing my vague game plan of having all ducks in a row then selling my flat. I'm wishing it was sold already. Maybe I'd be better off slapping paint over the rough walls, decluttering and selling without moving first. 🤔 It would be worth less, but possibly be better for us overall. 

I haven't decided about that... but I have decided to stop with reusable nappies. They take up too much space and they're becoming less pleasant as kiddo ages. I did my bit. (Ye gods am I becoming like a Boomer, I'm older now so who cares about the environment?)

The new perspective on stuff: I had originally bought more furniture to store my stuff. Now I want the furniture gone because it has allowed me to have too much stuff. I need to be less attached to keeping things "just in case" or because "it's worth something". 🤔

One more card issuer has closed my account. The debt charity is still sending me statements and behaving as if our (cancelled) arrangement is still full-steam ahead... Several banks are still referencing the (cancelled) debt management plan (including the bank which has handed by debt over to a debt collection company). Nobody seems bothered that this DMP isn't actually doing anything. I'm kinda intrigued how long this odd limbo will go on. 

Tail-Chasing

I've now been back at work for two weeks - four shifts completed so far - and I'm tired. Physically, I was an old lady after the first two shifts, rediscovering muscles I had forgotten existed (and I am certainly not doing physically-strenuous work, in fact, I've had it easy). But Little X, while utterly unconcerned at being left at nursery and not particularly relieved when I return, is equal parts clingy and utterly shattered on the days following each visit. She has thrown her nap schedule into the bin, refusing to sleep for the entire day at nursery and crashing into slumber as soon as we're home, closing on 5pm. Even on the "at home" days she falls asleep early and then insists on staying awake for the entire afternoon, resulting in a cranky kiddo. I wish I didn't need to work. It's nice to have adult conversation and my workmates have welcomed me back warmly but it's playing havoc with the mummy/kidlet energy levels.

Work is also a bit of a revolving door of staff. Favourite mini boss is leaving. 😭 I am disappointed but not surprised. Buddy-miniboss was sacked 😲 and replaced with Bert from Sesame Street, utterly dull. Newbie Miniboss #2 is apparently popular and seems nice, I will call them Slim Shady. I already lost Good Boss to a sister store and his replacement is totally Frasier from Cheers. Even poor Big Boss is clearly burnt out and has been remarkably candid about it all, saying that Frasier just doesn't jive the same way and the workplace culture has shifted under pressure from above. The whole feel has changed. We are all in there to work, collect our pay and leave. It isn't the cuddly helpy family it used to be. Even Model, who used to be emotionally invested, now seems cold and robotic. But as long as the company gives me the freedom I have earned, I'll stay (although money is also the only reason I'm there now myself). 😁

Sigh, on top of all the other reasons I need this money, I've received my accounts for the flat maintenence charge and thanks to their shitty creative retrospective increased accounting, I "owe" even more than I should. Worse, they are going to bill me for more of the major building work than they should. I am frankly disgusted and it's an amount that means I will need to pursue this formally (if not legally) but before I can go down that route I have to pay everything they claim I owe - and then fight it afterwards. I don't have enough to do that just yet. It will take me a few months. It's very disheartening. Time to change that list there on the right, and hope they are so disorganised that the building works don't get arranged for another year. Time also to rethink my longterm plan, which seems so hard to get my brain around, when the goalposts just keep moving.

The £634 for my NI contribution is safely tucked away and I am reassured they have my info and will be in touch soon to collect it.

I have a monster cold (as does Little X) and mine is a sinus infection and we are irritated at the world. I'm hoping it goes away in the next 3 days so I don't have to miss work. 🤞

Received: several letters from banks that certain things "might" happen if I don't X, Y Z. So far none of the "might"s have actually been of any consequence. Only one has passed on my account, and so far, no contact from the new administrator. The debt management company agreed I was definitely not going ahead with them, but is asking for payments still... I suppose it's extra unintentionally stalling. 🤷

Dumb Things

This piece of musical brilliance is in honour of today's shopping escapades. I went to Big Bargain Shop to spend the rest of the credit on my perks card and bought too much to fit in my freezer. Then for Everything Else at German Supermarket, I overspent and emptied the cash in my purse, forcing me to whip out the debit card. It was only £4, but I'm irritated, we do not need to buy £54 of groceries in one day! 

We toured another child care centre today and despite being pricy, it's the winner. I can claim from the whole fee, there are no extras, and they've offered to let me pay in instalments. ♥️ It's a lovely, kind environment and (winner!) most kids DIY lunch from home so Little X would not be the only one. ♥️ Time to lock the days in with Boss. I did buy markers, plain labels and snack boxes for Little X's nursery lunch, and a small backpack. 

I also decided to buy her a set of table and chairs, crayons and paper. Lately it feel like she's sorta missing out on certain things and experiences. I refuse to do paint or play doh (I'm sure she'll do those at nursery) but she can certainly learn to sit on a chair and scribble with a crayon. I must summon the confidence to put her into the Beach Play group in May and take her down to the sand and water play area nearby. 

I know that nursery is why I went nuts on shopping. She's not even starting full days for another 2 weeks, but I'm paranoid about packing lunches that look "acceptable" 🤦🏻‍♀️ and in her getting used to a broader range of foods. I suppose I just want my small human to be like every other kid, even though she is stuck with me! 

Anyway. Debt Charity have acknowledged my cancellation (good). It looks as though I will get a small cost-of-living payment in April (good) and hopefully the Nationwide bank bonus as well as their annual Fair Share bonus (not sure, they've promised me the first one, but I kinda owe them loads of money). Food research says I will get my payment soon. April is looking good, now to see what sort of debt letters turn up...

Horse-Holding

I was looking at the home page of a nearby preschool, wondering if they might take Little X next year so that I could return to work when she's older. To my surprise they take babies and their fees are very low. I have RSVP'd for their open night which just happens to be next week. They're full at present. Realising that they might not be the only ones though, I contacted two more. One has definite space (woo) and has invited me to visit (woo) but they are not cheap (boo). 👏 It's a five minute drive away, but like the first place I visited, parking is 💩 so it looks as though I will need to invest in a waterpoof jacket if the centre looks good. I think despite the cost and inconvenience, I will need to go ahead. 

Six toddler-sized toy cars arrived in the mail, thank you sis. They are a huge hit and a very-tired Little X began crying tonight as she wanted to pick up all 6 to show me, but couldn't manage to get them all into her hands at once. 😂 It was absolutely adorable. She is obsessed. I may need to hide three of them for a while to manage the frustration.

Council tax bill is only £22 per month. 👏 I have bought supermarket vouchers to get the cashback again, because apparently, I am being responsible with my food spending and it will be ok to stop using cash. Unexpectedly found enough in my Everup account to cover me for this month, yay. I should spend the last few pounds of my work bonus card credit somewhere, probably at Frozen Food Warehouse. And I must haul myself off to Big Cheap Clothes shop soon and use an old voucher which is still hanging around.

I recalculated my maintenance arrears for the flat. I am still not really sure what I owe, because they only send accounts once a year, but it looks like it's £1,500. I found a note in my phone were I've written that I owe more, though, so... well right now I've put £1,500 in my goals list over there ---> and if it's the bigger amount I will just deal with it somewhere in the future. I think it was remembering this missing debt which prompted me to look again at various childcare options. Keeping my work income would make such a difference. 🙏

I've also cancelled my DMP in preparation for self-management. Here's hoping it's as straightforward as it seems.

Ughness

So I've weighed it up and down and round about. There doesn't seem to be appropriate, affordable child care that will mesh with my changing work rota, so I'm going to give notice. I could have fought for fixed shifts or phoned a hundred home carers, but to tell the truth it will be a relief.

Another bank has locked my online account and two of them on my credit score show as "late payment". Neither has communicated anything but it's progress. Also, Debt Charity fixed the account that was messed up. 👍 But I'm still going to dump them shortly and go it alone.

This week I went over £1,000 in my "everything" fund. 🥳 And I still have grocery money left, with six days to go.

I am currently watching the Michael Sheen documentary where he wants to buy a million pounds of consumer debt and kill it for 100k. At the moment he seems genuinely perplexed as to why banks are making such an insane amount of interest out of the poorest in society - 40 or even 50 percent. I could tell you why mate, it's because so many of them will be unable to pay. You know, because they're the poorest. In all honesty they (we) shouldn't have been allowed to borrow it in the first place, being such high risk.

Real change needs to be about indoctrinating our children into saving for a rainy day. Not just a few pounds, but permantently living below their means. It hasn't been a thing since before the Baby Boomers were born.

Inconvenient Amnesia

I know it's March, but somehow I forgot that means April is almost here. And the 5th of April is the HMRC deadline for topping up missing NI years for the state pension. It's a terribly boring subject in general but basically, in my first financial year here I didn't pay enough NI to have the year counted towards a pension. You have the option to "top it up" with a cash payment which I sort of ignored last year due to being broke. Well, I'm still broke, but now it's my last chance. So I've got £700 about to jump out of my stash for this. It's a lot of money but will easily give me thousands more in my meagre pension and free money is good.

This leaves me with £250-ish and ideally I should save about £800 for maintenance arrears. I won't have £800 by April though, so I'll just have to pay what I can.

Big news - the bank which only just promised me fees are cancelled forever, has sent me notice of intention to default! This is actually great and much faster than expected. Now waiting for "the" letter and for the big red D to appear on my credit report. One down, 10 to go. The debt charity has told me they've corrected the account with the wrong number, but no, they have not. Oh well.

Work denied my leave for the month of June. I hope it was just a supervisor denying it by mistake, because most of them (and the boss) know I haven't yet returned to work. It's not the end of the world if I do go back then but I need to confirm which days they'll schedule me and somehow find £350 for child care up front.

I finished my £100 baby food study (phew) and it was actually enough effort to make the amount of cash seem appropriate. Now for the money to come my way quickly, please!

Roast chicken for dinner. I'm trying to empty my freezer because there's loads in there, I've just been too picky for too long.

I Just Gotta Letterrrr

....from Debt Charity, about that hold message on Overdraft Bank. It states the bank can't find account number 1234 5687, making the problem obvious, two of the digits are back-to-front. I have emailed them asking for the correction, since their DIY instructions don't work, but I thoroughly expect them to blab on about phoning them again and that's not happening.

I managed to take two bags of stuff to the baby bank (I forgot about the bagful already in my car 🤦🏻‍♀️) and I was hoping to find certain things... walking shoes, socks, vests, and toy cars without small pieces. I went home with wellies which light up, Christmas socks, canvas sandals, two vests and a rubber ball. Not a terrible result and Little X is obsessed with the ball! Oh and I got the most gorgeous little walking boots.

Currently awaiting a £35 payout from TopCashBack 👏

I'm finding Sundays a real drag because there is no chance of any letters in the mail. Imagine that, wanting to get mail. I think I am just impatient for news because it makes me feel informed?

PS I cleaned the wellies and now the lights don't work. Not too bothered though, I would rather Little Miss Wobbly Walker didn't have her eyes transfixed on her feet.

Poison Ivy Card's Poisonous Move

Today I received a letter in the mail from Poison Ivy Card. Despite informing me nine days ago that they had applied 60 days of Breathing Space, they cheerily announced that it has now ended. This is a slight counting fail. Maybe they decided that a Debt Charity payment arrangement negates Breathing Space? Maybe they have frozen interest already? There's nothing in their app to indicate either one. 🤷 I am not really concerned, I just find it rude. 😁

On the other hand one of my smallest creditors, a bank which has been rather rude even when everything was completely up-to-date, has accepted £5 per month until the balance is gone, and they have disabled any future interest and fees forever. That's what I like to see.

I have submitted a change of bank for work pay, but HMRC asked me to call back in one week when today's direct debit will have been applied at their end. They are the last two companies I need to remove from Overdraft Bank so that my money can't be swallowed into fees. Once that is done I will tell Debt Charity goodbye. They emailed today refusing my previously approved budget, won't discuss it all by email, and would I like to nominate a friend to phone them... er no. All up this is just yet another unhelpful thing they have done, so, buh-bye.

In non-DMP-related news, my building manager has announced maintenance charges of an extra £1,800 for essential works. You can't get blood out of a stone and I'm not the only one behind in payments, so... meh. 🤷

I reached payout of £50 on YouGov and £1 from WeAre8 😀 and also won a fiver for RevComps tickets, so I am looking forward to winning the gold bullion. That'd be nice, huh? 😄

Assortment of Spanners in the Works

I finally managed to log into the debt charity site, and Overdraft Bank has a marker beside it that it is "Held" and they're unable to make payments to the debt. I am of no mind to call them in the least, because I found out they aren't doing everything in my interest, so it looks as though self-management is a better way to go. It isn't ideal for me to have to find the mental energy to self-manage but I think this is what I will need to do. I will need to write to each bank with a monthly offer and hope it gets accepted.

It's an odd situation to be able to approach this now as a project and without shame. Shame is no longer the right perspective - I have had the revelation. This is - all - purely business to those banks, and my situation is factored into their business model, and yawningly routine for them. They send their flurry of red envelopes knowing that most customers will panic and pay. But there's a wealth of info out there on forums on how to approach it all and what not to do. So I'm going to be informed. And I am going to be doggedly determined and in this for the long game.

Life in G Flat

Feeling really flat. Had a good chat with my sister about it and she's in the same boat. The convo was prompted by Mum's birthday but it wasn't even that really. It's really hard when you realise your life priorities aren't what they should have been, and you're not sure what they should be or what you actually want, and can't figure out how to move forward. I think this is what people mean when they say "it's hard" - not that they are necessarily a teary mess 24/7, but that they have realised their life road map is blank and haven't got a clue how to get around anymore. And everyone around us is capable which makes it feel even more perplexing. Like, how do they do that? How do they adult? How do they plan for their futures, how do they make decisions? I used to know how to do this shit.

Anyway. The only option in this position is to keep walking forwards. So I do. The debt charity has approved my Debt Management Plan 🥳 but I haven't yet received the postal access code to get in and potter about and understand their online system. They sent over the amounts per creditor and I was surprised to find most will receive exactly £5, so now I wait to see if they all accept the proposal, then will let it run for a few months and see how I feel after that. The market research stuff arrived for Little X, I duly got it all ready and she shoved it away three times in a row. Safe to say she is not a fan. I mixed it with something from my kitchen cupboards and it eventually went down. I will still be honest and tell them it was rejected.

I actually got myself together and went off to Big Warehousey Supermarket to spend some money that has been sitting in a gift card for months. I had been going to buy a new micro, but it is still working fine despite looking awful, so I will just deal with it when it dies. £35 was on a non-refundable gift card and the electrical shops I could actually use it in are far too expensive anyway. BWS is the only place foodwise where I could go. They are absolutely not good value at all, they are convenience store prices, but I treated it like free money and came home with £25 worth of food. Treat: a proper curry. I haven't had one in a long long time and it was £2 and I made my own rice to go with it. Winner.

Bullet-Pointed Procrastination

I have loads of little things I would like to save money for right now. A girl's got a lotta dreams for someone with no cash, etc. 😁 But I haven't had any choice on where money had to go for a long time, it always just had to go on debts and survival.

So what did I do? Made a little graph thingy instead of doing more surveys for cash like I should. Or investment work, which irritates me so much now that I have largely ignored it for a couple of weeks. All my unused pennies are going into the same savings account, but it's nice thinking about all the different things they could cover so I've made it visual.

This fund will also be for things I know are coming but are big, like yearly insurance bills, quarterly power bills, MOT on the car, and road tax, etc. The car will need some repairs, probably by the end of the year. Even if I keep the car maintained throughout the rest of its financing (2.5 years) it'll be 13 years old by then, so that's the reason I have a "Next Car Fund" and obviously it's not urgent.

The flat remodel is just for a new wall and to move the kitchen, but will involve some plumbing, some electric, and also some moving house costs as well. For the Decluttering, I did a quick inventory of my belongings and figure that I could lose 100 small bags/boxes of possessions. I am counting the 3 bags which left the house last week. 

👜👕🏈👗👚👝💼📦🎨🎒🎾🔰👖🎩🎽

Moral reassurance: I am reading the very long online diary of a lady who went into a similar debt repayment arrangement. Hesitation: you're apparently not supposed to start your DMP until all your debts default. Even if you plan to pay all of it back. So I will ask the charity whether to hold fire. They still haven't approved me and I'm getting antsy with the waiting.

I need to visit the Food Club this week. It's a pain, but it does save me money.

Correspondence

The letters have begun arriving, creditors assuring me that interest and charges have been paused for two months of Breathing Space. I also received a huge Action Plan pack from the debt charity. So I found a stack of folders and I have begun filing each letter correctly to keep them ordered. I will need this paper trail for quite a long time. I also found a brand-new exercise book and I am planning to keep track of figures and debtors in there, for motivation. In ridiculous random colours, because I can, and because that makes it more fun. I may invest in stickers.

My Universal Credit money turned up early. It was an odd feeling to see it sat there in the account which nobody else can touch. For a moment I reflected on how this was "all I had" and then I realised, it's more loose cash than I actually had left available in credit last month. And there's several hundred more stashed over in the new savings account. And I didn't spend all of my grocery money either, despite going shopping yesterday.

I called Overdraft Bank today as I'm "supposed" to, trying to have the overdraft removed from my account and turned into a separate debt. This is intended to stop future fees and charges from eating into my money and allow me to control the rate that I repay that debt. They say they can't do it until the debt charity contacts them with a repayment offer. So that was annoying, it means I have to call several other places to move their direct debits away. 80 minutes on hold to the car finance company. 😑 And on Monday I will need to call the insurance.

£2 again from TopCashBack for buying a £5 Asda voucher, yes thanks! 

Even though this debt arrangement is taking up a lot of mental real estate, it's a good thing to have something to focus on. Apart from that my main goal was "escape this flat" which is not a very productive thought process while I have no means to do so. 😄 So I think I should figure out small things to achieve in the interim. Hmmm.

Floor-Pacing and Education

I'm still waiting to find out if my Debt Management Plan will go ahead. They wrote back to me asking for more documents and to explain various expenses and spending. I've supplied it all and it was a bit weird - I have been 100% honest, but I feel as though they're about to shout at me that I've been caught. It's strange. A little bit like that feeling when a police car siren comes up from behind and even though you've done nothing wrong, you draw in a breath and wait to be pulled over. 

🚓

I am still adjusting to the immediate first change, that is, not to have credit available. I was never someone who went nuts buying random items with it, but for five years it's always just been... there. I need something, no worries, I can have it. I might need to figure out which card, but it has been a given that there will always be a way I can buy what I need. Now, of course, that isn't true, and I have to stop and think because spending can't be undone and there won't be options if I get it wrong. It's tricky,

I have made the decision to take £70 of my £90 grocery money out in cash each month, so that I have the physical process of looking at what I can spend. It leaves a significant amount put aside for big bills, so I have opened a savings account paying 4%. I kept £20 for groceries to last until pay day and threw the rest in my new account.

Then oops. I jump in the car and bing, the fuel light came on. The savings account takes up to 3 working days to withdraw. Oops indeed. No other way to buy fuel. I hit "transfer" and realised I might need to spend food money, which was really depressing. Fortunately it went through before I even got to the petrol station... but lesson learned. It wasn't a nice feeling. I think it was a feeling I needed to feel. It has made me more determined to embrace this.

I belatedly had a realisation too, I won't be able to go with my original plan of move out, renovate this flat, sell for maximum price. I can't borrow the money and the cost of the renovation is more than I thought, too, so I wouldn't have made any profit. I'll need to at last pay for the layout conversion (new partition wall, kitchen ripped out, new kitchenette near the bathroom). That's still a few thousand, on top of needing to find moving costs, so I have plenty of time to think it over. 😆

Well, That Escalated Quickly

My Week in Money Land

Poison Ivy Card Issuer 1 & 2: How about we cut your monthly payments? 😍

Large Balance Supermarket Credit Card: we're not helping you. Ask the others. 

Personal Loan Issuer: You can't afford to pay half as much, so just keep paying the whole lot. Work with this Impartial Financial Planner or we won't help you.

Impartial Financial Planner: Can I sell you an investment product? Do you want to buy shares?

Me: Well, Self, 3/4 of the debt is not budging. Time for the fun and games... 

Three hours of fighting a shitty website form on a debt charity site and finally, finally I get to their recommendations and finally the thing stopped crashing, and it's all filled in, an income and expenditure report done. They've given me a budget and they recommended I go down the route of offering a settlement - only for me to download the pack and discover, that requires the sale of my flat, which isn't practical even if I wanted to. Back to the drawing board, the whole lot done again, and I have applied for a Debt Management Plan, which I hadn't thought would be possible. This involves me paying one affordable set amount each month to the charity, which distributes pieces of it to each lender and deals with them on my behalf. In theory lenders can still ask me for more money even with a DMP in place and do so via the courts, but evidently at my asset level it's a low chance. Fingers crossed.

The parts I like the best is that Loan Bank, with the biggest original repayments, which said no to cutting my repayments in half, will now receive less than 15%.

Prevailing wisdom in Internet Land is that I should have stopped paying everyone, and then default, before offering a tiny settlement. I couldn't bring myself to do it though... It'll all get paid, it's just a matter of a lotta patience. 🙏

On tenterhooks now while I wait to be approved...