Have you ever seen a butterfly in a glass display box? It's got a steel pin straight though it, holding it in place. Even if it were alive it wouldn't be going anywhere. It is trapped. That's how I feel financially and mentally in this too-small flat with too many belongings.
I've taken a few extra holiday pay hours and my time off will now end in July (or August, if I were to also take my allowed four weeks of unpaid leave). Tomorrow is Monday and it's time to start calling one nursery after another, hoping one of them has space for Little X, and the sooner she can start, the better. I don't want to go back to work but there is no longer a choice, and, mentally I know it has to happen now to preserve my sanity.
We're both still snotty and not yet on a good schedule, she attempts to go for her "night time sleep" at 4pm and is napping every few hours through the day. We need to get back to the outside world, visit some playgroups, and I need to rejoin the gym as soon as I have a nursery place for her.
I also haven't done any investment work in five weeks and had to pull all the cash out in order to fly us home. Meaning I'll have to build it all up again from scratch, something I'm not looking forward to. But it needs doing.
Motivation is sorely needed.
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